The Table Experience

Two Saturdays ago I was sitting in a class at my home church, First Baptist of Glenarden.  As a side note, the instructor referenced something that sparked my interest.  She mentioned the “Table Principle”.  I never knew there was such a thing!  But as she was explaining it to us, I knew exactly what she meant and clearly understood the spiritual significance of the table.  See, every now and then my sisters and I will talk about all of the great things that happened at our kitchen table growing up, inadvertently referencing this principle.

Reflecting on the time I spent in my parent’s home (I didn’t move out on my own until I was 26!), I can recall many powerful and also very ordinary experiences at our kitchen table.  This was the location where we enjoyed nightly family dinners.  The table is where my parents and a few of their close friends formulated the idea for their now 24-year old company.  When family or friends visited our home, inevitably we ended up grouped around the table eating, laughing, sometimes playing games, other times having thought-provoking conversations.  Whether the ordinary or extra-ordinary, the kitchen table is probably the most vivid recollection and symbol of my formative years.

Again, I don’t know much about the “Table Principle” other than what was shared with me in the matter of 60 seconds in my class the other day.  My interest is sparked and I’m launching my own personal research project (stay tuned- in the coming weeks I’ll share some of the great things I’ve found out).  But, I do believe in the essence of what I believe the principle is.  First, by taking time to sit down and enjoy a meal as a family regularly communicates to each other the importance of the bond and places a high value on quality time spent together.  I can imagine that some days it is easier (and maybe even necessary due to conflicting schedules) to do meals on the go and/or separately.  But making time to sit and enjoy the moments you have together can do wonders for your family life, strengthening relationships, and is likely to be a healthier meal and digestive period.

So, I think that first point is pretty basic.  Nothing new there, right?  Well, I suggest that the kitchen table can also facilitate life-changing experiences.  As I mentioned, my parents transformed a dream into reality at our kitchen table.  I was a bit too young at the time to internalize what was going on (as a matter of fact, I think I was somewhere playing with my sisters) but I’ve heard this story recounted enough to know now that it was not a chance encounter. 

One of the principles I’ve come to embrace is homemaking- ensuring your home is hospitable and a place of ministry.  My mother was definitely a homemaker and my father supported her in maintaining an environment that nurtured our family’s growth and invited the presence of God daily.  Because this was a part of their lifestyle, it was easy for God to work in our lives- the atmosphere was conducive to allowing His spirit to dwell within.  Thus, when others came into our home, they were ushered into His presence. 

My parents were/are innovators (my mother is deceased) and addicted to continuous growth and improvement.  They were/are also very inclusive and found ways to partner with people on almost everything they sought to do.  So, one night at our kitchen table, my dad’s dream, supported by mother’s commitment and practicality, connected with the strengths, talents and desires of the others at the table.  What could’ve easily been dismissed as a far-fetched, never-going-to-happen dream was welcomed as a reality-yet-to-come.  As a result, each of their and their family member’s lives were changed.  Sure, it wasn’t just the kitchen table.  But, because there existed a place that was regularly used as a meeting place of nourishment, fellowship and idea generation, what came next was only natural, with a bit of destiny mixed in.

This is only one of the many examples I reflect upon as I think about the “table principle”.  I know it is a powerful tool, that when allowed to be utilized by God, can grow families and friendships and turn regular encounters into life-changing experiences. 

Do you have any stories of how spending quality time at the kitchen table has enriched your life or that of your family or friends?  If you’re not currently utilizing your kitchen table for much more than a resting spot for mail, homework, etc. then I challenge you to clear it off tonight and have dinner as a family.  My own personal challenge is to take more opportunities to visit with friends and family and experience the power of enjoying time together around the kitchen table.

S*bm!ss!@n

Technically, submission has 10 letters.  But for a long time, in my book, it has been categorized as a 4-letter curse word.  I’m not unlike many independent, black females of the 21^st century.  You mention the word submission and immediately my eyes will initiate a roll.  And, don’t get me to talking about it.  Because surely you will start to see my neck begin to roll as I share my 2 cents on the subject.  Honestly, I’m not quite that bad anymore but the cultivation of a lifestyle of submission is a work-in-progress.

In the most simplest terms, submission is yielding your will to that of another’s.  It is agreeing to embark on the course that they’ve set and adopting their objectives and plans as your own.  Pretty straightforward right?  Oh, but did I neglect to mention, even when their will is different or contradictory to your own.  Yikes!  That’s when this thing starts getting real.

As outlined in the bible, we are called to submit in various relationships that we find ourselves in.  First, we are commanded to submit to God.  Living a life consistent with His commands, striving for holiness and purity and forsaking the longings of the flesh are ways that this is done.  We are also called to submit to our leaders- government, religious and vocational.  Obeying laws, guidelines, doctrines and directives that are consistent with the fundamental tenets of our faith is essential in achieving this.  Submitting to our husbands is probably one of the most well-known examples of submission.  It is actually pretty funny how many single women, like myself, have a problem with this (could this be part of the reason why we are STILL single?).  And finally, we are told to submit to one another.

Obviously I get what submission is and to whom I should be submitted to.  Where I struggle is how to actually do it.  At times I have a spirit that yearns to do it.  I am excited about the prospect of getting it right.  But then, me being the cerebral person I am, I often reflect upon the reasons why I shouldn’t- “DC and PG cops are incompetent and don’t do their jobs anyway”, “Politicians are greedy, lying, cheats that are only looking out for their special interests”, “Obviously God is tripping right now.  He doesn’t really want me to do that.”, “My dad (and in this case, my boss) is so old-school.  This is the technology age.  His way is antiquated.”    And then, I do it my own way and refuse the opportunity to be submissive.

There are times when even after rationalizing why I am right, I concede to do things “their” way.  I submit, but only after reassuring myself that (as usual) I am right and eventually I will prove it by doing it their way and watching it fail.  I understand that although I may have yielded to the authority, it wasn’t done in the spirit of a submissive heart and really isn’t aligned with what God desires from me.

But I’m declaring today, this has got to stop.  I am no use to God or anyone else when I think and act like I am always right and know best.  So, what am I going to do about it?  Glad you asked.

During this season of Lent I am doing a submission fast.  It’s really something I just made up but think it will be a great way of growing in this area.  It includes me engaging in a more complete study of submission- principles, scriptural references and practical application, then put them into action in my daily life.  This should be interesting…  I’ll keep you posted!